Why do people say that adoption is wrong and should adopt the U.S. (or where you live)?
What is point for their lack of culture and all, if the children die?
Some people seem to think that all life is a team sport wholesale, and that the team ___ (Whatever country they come) a * * WIN be the "best" and to win a game and it's best to remove all foster children more quickly. For people who see the world this way, any person adopting from abroad is to help another country to "win" and therefore a traitor. It does not help children or families Construction is to help American children and strengthening American families (or Canadian, English, etc. .. choose any developed country the West where adoption is common and where you can find these attitudes). For them, no matter if X number of children suffering in another country … These children and girls have the misfortune of being born on another computer, and it's just bad luck! They believe that foreign children are not entitled to parental love in the U.S. / Canada / Etc, provided that a child born in the U.S. / Canada / etc is not taken. People with the mentality of competition from countries accept that there will always be orphans and will always be a need for foster families, and that true success is to have a strong foster care system to provide needy children. Never reach a point where every child has a family and a host family is obsolete, if the adoption has been banned and anyone who wanted to adopt was made in the country! I think the conclusion is that children – many children around the world, here and everywhere – families need, and if someone offers one of the children of a family is a great thing not to be complained.
Medical & psychological concerns in International Adoption
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We are thinking about international adoption, does anyone have any advice or more information?
We have done some research on the internet for international adoption but I am looking for some advice from someone that has already done this. I know I should just adopt from the US but I heard it is more difficult because everyone wants a “baby” and we would rather help a child from another country. Any ideas will help. Thanks
As an IA parent, my advice is to do a LOT of research. Informed Adoption Advocates, as already suggested, is a great site.
I’m not sure from your question, if you have the expectation of adopting a baby. There are very few infants available for adoption. Most children available for adoption are school age, including sibling groups. Just like in the US, older children are often passed over in favor of younger children.
We adopted two older children (5 and 10 at the time) from overseas. We have had some adjustment issues, everything that I would consider to be normal and expected. But nothing like lighting the house on fire or killing the cat. I’m sure that does happen RARELY, because some severely damaged children in the US have similar stories, but it’s the exception, rather than the rule. Somehow, it’s become “common knowledge” that all older IA adoptees are violent and severely disturbed… probably because it makes for a better 20/20 story than older IA adoptees that make a relatively smooth transition.
Anyway, I could write books about what I’ve learned since becoming an IA parent and we did a LOT of research and preparation befrorehand. (Yes, we have close family friends that are adult IA adoptees. In fact it was one of them that suggested we look at international adoption in the first place).
Kristy, I had to laugh when I read your response. Yes, the reception we continually get is enough to make me question why I even bother posting here anymore. But a question asking for information about IA is a great way to get us to come out of the woodwork.
Let the TD’s begin!
Child Adoption Information : Should International Adoption Be Legal?
This collection of seven direct and practical articles (with an introduction and a book/video list) details the China-adoptive child’s need for heritage support, briefly defined as information (age-appropriately given) about her history and, in sum, a positive account of the country of her origin, and discusses common misconceptions surrounding the subject. The distinction between heritage and cul…
In thirteen essays–one on each state–noted historians provide a fascinating picture of the political process by which competing interests and ideas formed the Constitution….
My daughter is mine biologically, but not my husband’s. He adopted her in June and she is now three years old. I know she won’t fully understand the situation probably for many more years, but I want to start now introducing the idea to her that she is adopted so that she never feels like she was lied to. Does anyone know of any books or kid movies that deal with this subject that might help introduce this to her? How do I explain her birth father? He was abusive and an alcoholic and drug user but I don’t want her to know all of that. I thougth about just saying “he didn’t know how to be a dad to you” but I’m afraid that won’t be a good enough answer. HELP!
hey, don’t worry too much, she’s only 3 right now.. I was adopted at birth, and my family just said i was adopted, thats about it, and it never bothered me ever… at the time, my birthdad and birthmom did a fair amount of drugs too i believe, but that isn’t important right now, since they’re sweet grown up people now.. what’s important is that you express your wish to love her as your daughter… Just tell her how glad you were to have her as your child.. Things will change in 10-15 years, but pretty much just express your caring attitude, and it should be alright.. email me if you wanna talk about it, I’ve got through 21 years of it, cheers!
Relationship Problems? Personality Profiling Can Help
Have you ever wondered just what makes another family member tick? They probably wonder just the same about you! With personality profiling you can discover how to improve any relationship. Before looking into the relevance of profiling in relationships, first a little background.
Introduction
People are different – but they are predictably different. A personality profile helps predict how someone will react in a given situation, helping you understand what motivates them – and what they’re trying to avoid. And they can understand you too. In his book “The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People”, Dr Stephen Covey said: “Seek first to understand, then to be understood.”
In 1926 Dr William Marston, an expert in behavioural understanding and the inventor of the polygraph (lie-detector), devised a system to understand people’s personality styles. In his book “The Emotions of Normal People” he grouped people according to their active or passive tendencies, dependent upon their view of the environment. The main styles identified are:
D – Drive – “My Way” (3% of the population)
I – Influence – “The Fun Way” (12% of the population)
C – Compliance – “The Right Way” (16% of the population)
S – Steadiness – “The Safe Way” (69% of the population)
Of course there aren’t just four styles, as everyone exhibits different levels of each of the four, resulting in an almost infinite number of combinations of the main styles. In fact a profile that showed someone as all one style would be extremely suspect. Your style, for instance, may be a combination of ‘High D’, ‘Medium I’, ‘Fairly C’ and ‘Low S’. No style is inherently ‘Good’ or ‘Bad’.
The aim of profiling is to identify and play to your strengths, while utilising the self-awareness of possible weaknesses. If you choose to share this knowledge with others, and they’re willing for you to study their profiles, relationships can be transformed.
Suddenly you may realise that what seemed to be an irritating trait in your partner has value you never appreciated before.
The personality profile derived from the combination of the different levels of each style gives an amazingly accurate profile of the subject in:
How they think of themselves;
How others see them;
How they act under stress;
Their communication preference;
Greatest fears;
Greatest motivators.
Knowing your own preferred style, and that of others, can go a long way towards creating an environment in which Dr Covey’s recommendation to “Think Win/Win” can flourish.
1. Responsibilities can be shared in a way that best utilises talents, instead of putting round pegs in square holes. For instance a High C hates conflict, so their High D partner would be better suited to complaining about poor service.
2. When you understand a partner’s greatest fears, this may explain many things that remain unsaid. In the example above, the High D who enjoys a full and frank exchange of views, may finally realise why a High C partner repeatedly puts off making that phone call of complaint.
3. You will understand how to motivate your partner, how they set goals for themselves and how best to support them. The High I ‘big picture’ goal-setter will often benefit from some detailed plans prepared by a High C family member.
4. You will learn possible growth areas – a High I may get a better response from others if they talk less and listen more. A High S can try to be more open to change. A high D and a high C may both come to appreciate the benefits of developing personal relationships, although these two will initially exhibit very different styles.
5. Graphs in the personality profile can identify normal individuals going through a tough time – for instance stress at work, or those too wary of making a move for fear of failure. They do not identify mental health problems.
6. Different styles communicate very differently. For example a high S working with a high D may withdraw in the face of the D’s direct style, thus slowing down results. When both are aware of their communication styles they can seek to modify their communication style and at least allow for the other’s point of view, even though they are unlikely adopt it themselves.
7. Personality profiling terminology provides a less-confrontational language for pointing out a partner’s unhelpful behaviour. For instance, “You need to up your C today” is likely to be better received than “Don’t you ever stop and think before you act?”
Obviously any of this knowledge could be used exploitatively, but that is counter-productive to building good relationships and has no place in the ethical use of personality profiling. If you fear that your partner might abuse the knowledge gained, it would be unwise to share it – relationship counselling would then be more appropriate.
Have you guessed what your style is? I guessed mine, before completing the questionnaire, and I was completely wrong. However, I have to confess that, as I read the report, I could see that I was deceiving myself, and in fact the analysis knew me better than I did. I wanted badly to be a High D – direct, dominant and demanding, instead I was a High C – compliant, contemplative and careful.
At first I was disappointed, but the point of personality profiling is to highlight strengths. Don’t be fooled into think that C and S styles are weak – they’re not. The more of the report I read, the more I realised that characteristics I was lukewarm about in myself are actually strengths I can use to move forward in a way that won’t make me feel threatened and I now know (and recognise from the past) the pitfalls I need to avoid.
What is your partner’s profile? Reading my own partner’s report, with his permission, gave me a new insight into some of his character traits. Knowing the motivation behind them helps me more deeply appreciate his talents and realise that we just have different ways of expressing ourselves.
How about your teenager son or daughter, now so difficult to understand? Think what it would be like to get into their heads and know what makes them tick. The possibilities are endless – for self-knowledge and for better inter-personal relationships at home and at work.
For a free eBook on other benefits and applications of personality profiling and to download a free sample report visit the website below.
Childless couples no longer need to despair about all the legalities that adoption entails. The 76-page eBook, âAdoption Made Easy,â explains all the adoption laws in a simple, well-organized manner. Several valuable tips on how to adopt a child either in your own home country or from a foreign land form the contents of this book, which is written just to help you bring home your new chi…
Although you may think that you have the right to adopt, this is simply just not the case. No one in todayâs society has the absolute right to adopt a child, and can only do so after they have met certain criteria that both the adoption agencies and the government place. It is therefore important that any prospective people wishing to adopt a baby should carry out as much research as possible…
I looked and I could find for parents. I am adopted and a teenager what I will find a group support in Michigan, where possible, for children. Please list the sites below. Thanks
http://www.adultadoptees.org/forum/ Although this is an adult site to be taken, we have a section for teens, and we have several teenagers who publish there. We also provide information for the State for approval. Hope this helps.
This digital document is an article from Whole Dog Journal, published by Belvoir Media Group, LLC on December 1, 2009. The length of the article is 669 words. The page length shown above is based on a typical 300-word page. The article is delivered in HTML format and is available immediately after purchase. You can view it with any web browser.Citation DetailsTitle: Do what you can: volunteer, don…
This digital document is an article from Pediatric News, published by International Medical News Group on March 1, 2002. The length of the article is 594 words. The page length shown above is based on a typical 300-word page. The article is delivered in HTML format and is available in your Amazon.com Digital Locker immediately after purchase. You can view it with any web browser.Citation DetailsTi…
